Cheer up, boys. Your make up is running.

Sorry about the temporary outage of Beans and Mary Jane. Shit happened that was not in my control.

Yesterday, my appointments cancelled, and it was a beautiful day. I hate wasting a good day; much less a BEAUTIFUL day. I called the hippy to find out what was going on. He was off work, and I was close enough. We couldn’t come up with a plan, so we decided to get some beer and talk about it. We killed a 12 pack and decided we needed to be out of town. We went to the river, smoked and drank. I had to go get some groceries for my sick special lady friend, so we left the country, and headed back to town. We were too damn late, and the pharmacy was closed.

When we got back home, we got the rest of the beers and headed back to the country. We climbed a big hill, hoping to be on the top of the bluff by sunset. We didn’t make it. I’d never been to this particular bluff, but the hippy had. We sat on top of a big old rock and built a nice fire; you know, on account of it being all dark and stuff. We sat up there and drank beers, smoked and watched the fire for probably an hour or so. Well, we only had 4 beers left (out of the 30 that we’d bought yesterday), it was dark, and I wasn’t completely sure how well I could walk. Turns out that I could walk just about as well as the hippy. When we started walking back, I didn’t know north from south, let alone east from west. I was lost already. We meandered throughout the woods until I finally asked, “Do you know where we are?”. He said yes, but I wasn’t convinced. The trip back down the mountain took much longer than the trip up the mountain. I was carrying an ice chest with 4 beers in it. We had no flashlights. I fell about 3 or 4 times on the way back to the truck. Once I stepped off of a large drop off; another time, I tripped over a log. One particular time, my leg got hung up and I fell (with the ice chest), did a couple of summersaults and hit the left temple of my head on a tree. I have a couple of large lumps on my head that are decorated with scrapes. I look so lovely right now. 
The hippy was falling all over the woods, too. “We’re going to have to sleep out here,” I finally say. Actually, I said that more than once. I really kind of wanted to. Eventually, we stumbled onto a trail (that we’d never seen) and followed it down to the main road.

I don’t guess I’ve ever been lost in the woods like that before. It was pretty cool. I was about to go Man vs. Wild, and start eating worms, drinking my own piss, and playing with dangerous animals. It was a CRAZY Monday. My head hurtses.

-Beans™

For your listening pleasures…

 

A boring writing about an exciting night on the town.

So, I get in touch with my cousin yesterday. We’ve never hung out really, at all. He only lives about a 30 minute drive from my house. It sucks that we don’t really keep in touch very often.

My other cousin, his brother was in town as well (which I didn’t know until yesterday). Well, he calls me up and tells me that they’re meeting at Hooters to watch some basketball and drink some beer. “We should be there around 7:00,” he says. Me and the hippy got to Hooters at about 7:00. I call my cousin to see where they are, and he tells me that they should be there in another hour or so. Well, the waitress was probably lacking in the looks department (not that I wouldn’t, if I weren’t completely devoted to my special lady friend). By the end of the night, she was looking like a model. Anyways, the waitress obviously had some sort of thing for me. As I said before, though, I’m completely devoted. I won’t say there was no flirting from me going on. Jesus though, when there’s an even half-way decent girl that makes it somewhat obvious that she wanted my cock in and around her mouth, it helps the old ego. The hippy and I had a few pitchers, and a few extra beers, aside from the pitchers. We get ready to leave, and I tell Becca how much I’ll miss her; while trying to finish the last of my beer. She says, “Go ahead, take the glass with you. I won’t say anything.” I shoved the glass under my coat, and headed to the truck.

We all decide to meet up at Tables and Ale, and take advantage of their $1 beers. We had 2 and realized that the liquor store was getting ready to close, so we ran out and found the closest liquor store and headed home with our shiny new case of beer.

On the way home, me and the hippy sucked smoke from a lit joint into our lungs. We got home, barely; because I was about to run out of gas. It costed me $70 to fill the freaking truck up.

I went home and went to bed.

I honestly don’t know why anyone reads this shit. I’m glad someone seems interested in my meanderings.

-Beans™

When I think about saxaphones, it always happens.

The hippy shaved off his dreadlocks. He got all messed up on some “homemade” absinthe, and shaved his head. This video, if I can get it to work, was taken about 4 days before he cut the dreads.